IRE Scoville Scale: Tastefully Wicked










The sunlight piercing John’s bedroom marked another morning Tammy would wake in his arms. In the month that passed, John found it increasingly more difficult to sleep alone. Their nightly phone call soon become “Hey, I can’t sleep. Coming over.”…. which eventually became their afternoon “What time can I expect you?” discussion. Like clock work, by midnight they’d be in bed sound asleep, exhausted from a long day or their last romp.

What neither of them was aware of was their increasing relevance in the others life. While not in a serious relationship, they’d certainly moved beyond being mere bed-buddies. Void of verbal confirmation, what they had was an ‘understanding’ which neither of them questioned. Tammy was sure that John was aware that she was falling in love with him; while John was under the impression he as alone in that regard. Neither would speak words the other needed to hear because it was “understood”, right?

John reached across Tammy, resting comfortably against him, and hit the alarm clock.

“Ten more minutes.” she whispered softly, snuggling into his warmth. 


                        
**************



“What do you have?” John asked Dennis, the firm’s junior associate and his protégé.

“Mr. Cates. It seems his second marriage has hit the rocky shores of matrimonial bliss.” Dennis headed a copy of the client’s documents over John’s large desk.

“I don’t handle divorces and neither do you. Why are you involved?”

“Mr. Cates doesn’t want to loose his shirt in the likelihood there is a divorce. With his estates, holdings, investments and other business interest, his estimated worth is around a half a billion dollars. So…”

“So he would like you to hide it for him,” John remarked. “You were thinking an off-shore account or maybe some bank in Switzerland would do the trick?”

“Exactly.”

John sat up from his reclining position, shaking his head impatiently. “Haven’t I taught you anything about international finance regulation? If you take that route, your client will be sucked dry and you could find yourself in jail.” He stood walking from the office with Dennis is tow. “Banks and off-shore accounts, please. Do I look like a proletarian?”

“What should I do?”

“When’s your next meeting with Mr. Cates?”

“Tomorrow afternoon.”

“Is he expecting a remedy of some kind?”

“Yes.”

John stopped and turned on heel, “Then I suggest you dust off those reference books and devise a clear game plan because what you have so far is bullshit. You need to think outside of the box. See me in the morning.”

He continued to Tammy’s desk, collecting her for their evening briefing. “Are you ready?” he asked.

“I can’t. Mr. Woodson has booked me for the rest of the evening. His secretary is out on maternity leave.” Tammy juggled her paperwork as they walked to Mr. Woodson’s office. “I was about to come and see you. Most likely I won’t be home before midnight.”

“Well, what am I supposed to do?”

“You’ll have to fend for yourself tonight.” She smiled up at him.

“I was talking about my case load, Miss Vain.”

“Everything you asked for is on my desk and I recorded this morning client briefings and emailed you the .wav files.”

“Ah, I see you thought of everything,” he knocked on Mr. Woodson’s office door, opening slowly. “But you couldn’t think of a way to get out of it.” he chuckled.

“Sorry, but I’m commandeers your secretary, John.” Said George Woodson, the firm’s oldest partner and John’s former mentor. “I had no other recourse.”

“That’s fine. See that she’s returned in same condition you found her.”

“I promise not to over work her. We’ve sent out for a temp but none have been worth a damn. I can’t afford any mistakes with the Belen account; too much is riding on its success.”

“Well Tammy is the best we have to offer,” he turned to the door. “I’ll leave you to it then. Remember what I said, George. I want her back in the same condition.”


 
It was well after midnight when Tammy slipped into bed. John gathered her into his arms and they drifted fast asleep.


                                                                  
***************



 The morning sun found Tammy fully dressed and headed out of the house.

“Hey, what are you doing up so early?” John asked as she darted around the room collecting the rest of her belongings.

“Good morning. Mr. Woodson asked me to come a little early. He’s brought in additional counsel for research purposes and he wants to meet with all of us this morning.”

“I know he’s pulled Brandon and Clinton, who else is he bringing on?”

“Mr. Ulrich.” Tammy said quietly. Jeff Ulrich was John’s arch enemy and, unknown to Tammy, his stiffest competitor for her attention. But where John was discreet in their dealing, Jeff wouldn’t have been. He was an over confident braggart and any female unfortunate enough to get caught up with him would soon regret it.

“Jeff!? He’s bringing on Jeff?!” he sat up in bed. “Why in hell’s name would he do that?”

“Calm down. Mr. Ulrich is there for the same reason we all are, research. We’re damn fact-hounds.” She replied kissing him on the forehead. “I have to go. I can’t be late.”

“Are we still on for lunch?” he called after her.

“We’ll play it by ear.” 



******************



“Mr. Carpenter, I’m fucked.” Dennis said collapsing on John’s office sofa.

“What happened?”

“Nothing, that’s the problem. I can’t figure out a way to make a half a billion dollars go away. I’ve been up all night and I have shit to show for it. Mr. Cates will be here in less than three hours and I have nothing to show him.”

“Ha! You stayed up all night over something as simple as this?! Do I have to draw you a map? Besides the wife, who’s the biggest succubus riding Mr. Cates’s ass?”

“The Feds.”

“What’s the only currency the Feds track?”

“The U.S. dollar.” Dennis said sitting up.

“Bingo. Over the next six months, Mr. Cates will withdraw all but five million dollars out of his US account. He will then buy blind trust in Panama, Brazil, Vanuatu--- any country that doesn’t report back to the Feds or the EU. Once his money has been converted into the local currency, he will then look to invest in smaller countries, less visible places. Think Africa. If and when he needs his money, he purchase gold and minerals out of India by the bar and what does he do…?”

“He sells it back to the Feds and EU.” Dennis felt like the weight of the world was off his shoulders. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

“Because you’ve the “Swiss Bank” approach drilled into your head by law school. That textbook bullshit doesn't work the post 9/11 world. They may have rewritten the rules but we’re changing the game. Now, get the hell out of my office and go find your balls before your client arrives. Call me if you need me.” John smirked. 


                                                    
*****************



“Hey, you got a second?” Tammy asked entering John’s office, finding him reviewing documents in the sofa.

“Sure, what’s on your mind? Are we still on for lunch?” he asked pulling her into his lap.

“That’s what I came to talk to you about. I’m not going to make it to lunch or dinner tonight. Jeff---”

“Jeff? Since when have you started calling him “Jeff”?”

“Do we have to go through this again? Damn, we’ve been working side by side for over a month, John. I think we’re on a first name basis now. It doesn’t change anything between you and me.”

“You working side by side with him changed a lot between us. We hardly ever see one another.”

Tammy took John’s face in her hands. “You’re jealous.” She smiled.

“No, I’m not! I’m horny, there’s a big fucking difference.” He gaily kissed her neck.

“Alright, I’ll make up an excuse to leave early if you promise to take it ease on me. It’s been over a month. No putting holes in the walls.”

“Putting holes in the walls?! Baby, that’s amateur hour. I plan on putting your ass through every piece of building material in my house! Oh, you think it’s a game? You’ll end up in the intensive care unit.” He joked.

“I guess that’ll teach me to keep you waiting, huh?”

“Yes, it will. Now get out of here before I rip your clothes off.”

Tammy stood and leaned down kissing his lips while running her hand up his inner thigh.

“Get out of here, Devil Woman!” he ordered, playfully pushing her away.

“Fine, I’ll see you tonight.”