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Heaving Bosoms & Rigid Fiddlesticks
- By Tracy Ames
- Published Today
I’m beginning to think my true calling in life was that of the consummate antagonist because my keen ability to piss people off is unrivaled. Yesterday, two fellow authors and I sat on a panel discussing the evolution of standard prose & genre definition. To be honest, I’m rather sick of these conversations. With the publishing houses and editors casting their lot on the side of modernity, we can all agree that the unyielding rules of style and genre categorization are being rewritten. The days of black and white lit are gone; in its place we have gray areas: Romanica, polylit, docudrama.
Not only have readers embraced these new genres, we created them. I say we because most modern writers are nothing more than refugees from the Harlequin camp who struck out on our own after reading one too many tales of heaving bosoms and rigid fiddlesticks.
“Cocks have no place in romance.”
I don’t know about that. True, one shouldn’t employ graphic language to create a scene; it should be used to punctuate the setting as I’ve written here and here. Cocks will remain in my writing. But the level to which the bluestockings are prepared to go to bar any form of naughtiness from impregnating their genre pretty much epitomizes their staunch commitment to present sex completely stripped of any pleasure.
And don’t get me started on humor!
One of the panelists mentioned reading “Hers For The Taking” and found the humor 'light'. Humor, it turns out, has no place in romance and erotica. Bitch, it wasn’t like there were juggling circus clowns! And yes, I told her as much (there’s where the pissing off bit came in). I’m a cheeky smartass with a hankering for the absurd, and I have a sneaky suspicion my readers are the same way.
A story should combine a little of everything: Humor, love, tragedy, and sexytime. No one wants to read entire stories about characters taking long rain soaked walks on the moor, dreaming of unrequited love. Even to the most untrained of eyes, that story would suck!
So, there you go. I pissed off my fellow panelist. This to, she shall overcome.
Yesterday, Eva sent me this picture. I love that gal!
Bite Me! The Blog
- By Tracy Ames
- Published Yesterday
With the swelling popularity of television shows such as True Blood and Being Human, and the literary mega franchise Twilight, it was only a matter of time before the vampire fetish crawled from the back ally club scene into mainstream society. The bloodsuckers of old horror films have shed their soulless past and emerged with a hot sexy vibe that has everyone begging to be bitten. From clothing to views on sexuality, Vampires have assimilated into almost every facet of our day-to-day lives, as such, their shock value is virtually lost. Many argue this acceptance of vampires is due in large part to our better understanding of the biological process of death and our own morality. Rubbish, its Brad Pitts’s fault. Plastering his shirtless body on any product is equivalent to writing a blank check on the soul of humanity.
“Mommy, miming farm animals can’t be an abomination. Shirtless Brad Pitt said so. See?”
There was a time when average people frowned upon anyone taking part in subculture antics and we labeled them basement dwellers. But with the immense success of role-playing games such as Vampire: The Masquerade, an average Joe can slay a virgin in the woods and pop back in his Ford Focus without the neighbors batting an eye.
A large percentage of the Vampires swelling fame can be attributed contemporary writers. They’re doing today what Anne Rice did for vampires in the 70’s. Vampires have always been dark and alluring, but modern artists have repackaged, revamped (no pun intended), and sexed up the vampire image something fierce!! Really, the fangy crowd should bow and kiss our shiny boots—were it not for writers and filmmakers, they’d be laid out with Aunt Bee’s table leg protruding from their chest. I mean it vampires, bow down!
In my humble opinion, the vampire fetish differs very little from other fetish. As long as the participants adhere to the ground rules, it’s all good. It goes without saying that some people use the vampire fetish as a liberating conduit. You can’t be blamed for having a screaming orgasm or stepping outside of convention if you were under the control of a swarthy vein-drainer. Two points here: First, regardless of what thumpers tell you, orgasms are our divine human right. Second, see paragraph number three. No one cares!
Whether we understand it or not, the vampire fetish and the vampire allure are here to stay. Below you’ll find my recommended vampire documentaries (click name to view) and vamp based books. Enjoy!
Documentaries:
Smithsonian Channel
The Vampire Princess
BBC
A History of the Vampire
History Channel
Decoding the Past: Vampire Secrets
Books:
The Bitten by L.A. Banks
Thirteenth Vampire by L.A. Banks
Red's Robin: Vampire Memoirs by Nicola Ormerod
"Answering His Call" Part Two Is Now Available
- By Tracy Ames
- Published September 1, 2010
Good afternoon everyone,I meant to have "Answering His Call" Part Two up last night but I couldn't. It's available now. I'll give it another pass later...as for now I'm taking my butt to bed.
Remind me to tell you guys about my scary conversation with BC. He's a weird little fella!
The Informal Formality of Kink
- By Tracy Ames
- Published August 31, 2010
I receive a ton-o-mail from readers curious about Kink. The inquiries are pretty basic: How to get involved, safety tips, and questions of etiquette. Bloody hell, where do I start? In this post, I’ll address initial meeting etiquette. To be honest, the differences between Kink etiquette and the norm are very little—save the threat of being utterly humiliated and flogged…at the same time…and not in the good way.
Formality differs from person to person however there are a few hard and fast ‘rules’ to keep in mind. These tips apply to vanilla subs (male or female) unless otherwise mentioned.
Say you’ve been invited to a munch* or happen to be at a Kink club/gathering. You see a striking Dom you’re compelled to meet:
DO NOT:
Throw yourself at their feet and gravel
Address them as Mistress or Master
Unleash a stream of compliments
Bad mouth other Doms
Babble on about the hours you spend reading and/or wanking to their blogs
Ask for their phone number
Ask personal questions (family & sexual questions are cardinal sins)
Offer to be their personal ashtray for the evening
Insult their sub(s) present or not
Touch or come on them in any way shape or form (not even a handshake)
Ask to have a picture taken with them
Monopolize their time (avoid long, loud, & lewd)
Brag to your friends that you’ve met them (bragging/name-dropping is a no-no)
Approach them, drink in hand and insist they drink
Burst into tears
Read off your Kink CV (resume) to them
DO:
Introduce yourself when there’s a break in conversation or have the host introduce you.
Bookend your conversation by addressing them as sir or ma’am**
Be sincere and respectful when paying compliments (limit it to two)
When mentioning their blog/site/articles, refer to a specific point/post
Be brief unless they open further conversation
Carry yourself with confidence. Doms abhor ‘five minute rollovers’
Acknowledge their sub(s) with a simple hello
Offer to replenish their drink if no sub is present but don’t push it***
Keep the conversation positive
Adhere to social cues. Excuse yourself if another Dom approaches—stay if asked
Give them your email info, but don’t expect to hear from them again
If asked, mention a couple of your interest. Be thorough but brief as most Doms will indulge you
Dom to Dom:
Welcome to the club, newbies!! Dominants have a natural ‘Try me’ vibe. Don’t attempt to conceal it by acting silly or overaggressive. You’re failure to do so will result in eye rolls. Here’s an easy way to look at it: Remember your first day on the job? You spent the day feeling people out; you were respectful yet determined to stake your claim. Introducing yourself Dom to Dom is much the same.
Introduce yourself politely without sir and ma’am (unless addressing a legacy, in which case try not to piss yourself) and wing it and relax. In the end, offer your email address. Most times we’ve exchanged addresses. Don’t hesitate to ask to be added as a contact. Also, giving your info to a particular Dom isn’t considered an insult. Like I said, wing it.
I hope this helps. Please let me know if you have any questions.
*A munch is the simplest, quickest way to meet Kinksters of all levels in a safe environment that’s grounded in reality. Think of them as kick-ass socials! People come and talk about Kink however you’ll most likely hear conversations about non-Kink hobbies, holiday plans, books and movies, and so on. Munches put a human face on the community while affording newbies a chance to scope things out. No sex is involved…Period. That’s just wrong!
**Mistress/Master are reserved for their subs. Do not repeat sir and ma’am throughout the conversation. That’s just weird.
***Offering to do anything for a Dom with a sub present is extremely disrespectful to the sub. I’ve since subs dissolve into tears over a glass of Coke. Subbies, gotta love’em.
Christopher Reilley's Acoustic Ink Interview Is Now Available!
- By Tracy Ames
- Published August 30, 2010
Good Morning Folks, Christopher Reilley, our much loved resident poet, has an Acoustic Ink interview available. Please stop by, give it a read and let him know what you think.
What I like about Christopher is his subtle nature. You don’t expect to hear some of the stuff that comes out of his mouth. Very WASPy in that way. His words tug at my heart nonetheless….
Also checkout his current poem entitled "Black Lace and Bluebelle"
The Loss of Intimacy
- By Tracy Ames
- Published August 30, 2010
After watching BC sprint across the pasture towards the barns, I took my laptop on the front porch (because I’m country like that) and began my work day. A girlfriend asked me to write an article for her site about the loss of intimacy, sexual or other. Again, I’m not expert—I’m spit-balling from experience and countless hours of research.
The topic arose while we sat going through emails. I’m still amazed by the volume of emails I receive from men complaining about their partners’ unwillingness to seduce and beguile them. I thought we’d jumped that pond and were settled comfortably on the shores of sexual expressionism.
I’m not going to dive into the meaty goodness that is my article, but I will ask: Do we unwittingly limit our sexual passion when we tie ourselves emotionally to others? Do we, after the ring and kids, lose that burning desire for uninhibited lovin’?
Perhaps it’s not lost at all. Maybe the dry spell occurs without our knowledge because we become so caught up in the quotidian drudgery that makes up every day life with our spouse, we find it difficult to see them (and by proxy ourselves) as the primal beasts we once knew.
Or maybe it’s a sticky combination of things deep fried in a hot vat of WTF...who knows. One thing is certain, the reasons behind ones loss of intimacy are infinite and arbitrary which inherently makes it hard for people on the outside looking in to understand.
In the end, the question is how does one get it back? Or does one really want it back? Wanting intimacy with your spouse is key. If the very thought of your spouse touching you gives you the willies, you might want to sort that roadblock before you move forward.
“It’s not that I don’t want sex or intimacy, I just don’t want it from you.”
Ouch! Yes, those words hurt both the giver and the receiver but if its how the person feels then it’s valid. Admit and validating those feelings are the first steps to getting to the bottom of the problem. Understandably, some aren’t ready to take that step. Besides ‘Hey, little Billy isn’t your son’ or ‘Remember last Christmas at your sister’s house?’ telling your spouse that you no longer want them in an intimate capacity has to be the hardest words to utter.
Fret not; the vacuum created from the inability to face certain areas of one’s relationship is quickly filled by other means. No, not cheating. I’m talking about escapism….aka what pays my bills. Ummm, I’ll say no more.
Once the article is complete, I’ll post it here as well. Goodnight.
BTW, I'll try to write shorter blog post. Sorry....:)
Hide The Firearms, It's A Mini Rant
- By Tracy Ames
- Published August 28, 2010
I’m sitting on a panel as I type this mini rant whose genesis was a full rant but I have neither the emotional nor mental capacity for all that jazz. The topics that driven me into blog retreat are the views of Andrea Dworkin, a radical feminist and writer best known for her criticism of pornography. And Cathy Young's statement “Intercourse is the pure, sterile, formal expression of men's contempt for women”. Wiki it, it’s all there. I more than anyone dislike clips of someone’s statements being used against them because they can be taken out of context. So please, if you’re not already familiar with their views, feel free to read up on them before you form your opinion.
Long story short, I don’t like Cathy because, to put it plainly, she’s a world-class twat. And I dislike Andrea’s views because they’re too extreme and she contradicts herself on a number of occasions on very poignant topics, aka the very foundation of her arguments.
In one breath “All heterosexual sex is rape” and the other “I think both intercourse and sexual pleasure can and will survive equality…. Since the paradigm for sex has been one of conquest, possession, and violation, I think many men believe they need an unfair advantage, which at its extreme would be called rape. I do not think they need it.”
I smell a contradiction. Or do I?
I studied Andrea’s work in college and beyond. It took me a long time to work out what she meant by saying 'all men are rapists'. I thought she meant that ultimately all men are governed by their wanks and, given their hardwired predilection for violence, they’d inevitably rise up and sexually assault a female. It’s only fairly recently that I've learned that she meant the sheer act of penetration is, by definition, rape.
Okay, so that’s still fucking rubbish but not as bad as saying all men are rapist because give a lesbian a strap-on and she to can aspire to rape. Now the playing field is even!
But there still I have a problem. It’s easy to analyze various actions, sexual or otherwise, in a purely abstract context, without considering human feelings, the essence of what makes us people, or in these context women. My contention is that any woman (and indeed any man) can do whatever she wants sexually as long as it's adult and consenting.
I reject the notion that all heterosexual sex is rape. What makes it so? Penetration? Um, that defense reeks of dick envy if you ask me (and by reading this blog post, you did ask me!).
I don’t have dick envy. I rather like my cooter and take very good care of her. And I certainly reject anyone equating sexual intercourse with rape. One doesn’t parallel the other in any way shape or form.
Let me end this mini rant before I pull out my Domina ID and show out. Back to your regularly scheduled orgy....:)
Rips: My New Addiction
- By Tracy Ames
- Published August 26, 2010
You guys are going to think I’ve gone crazy-er. I have a new addiction. Rips Candy! They’re bite size pieces of really sour licorice. Holy cow they’re good and their distributed from Iowa!Momma Ames took BC to Walgreen’s the other day and, somehow, he came home with a bag. After eating a couple and thoroughly burning his tongue, I inherited the bag and he went back to eating sour grass (don’t ask).
Anyway, Greg purchased every bag on the shelf and I’ve eaten so many my tongue is raw. It’s bloody painful! Now I know how BC feels when something burns his tongue.
Other than that, we’re adjusting to country life. Zora and BC have their quirks but she’s an excellent teacher. BC’s adding and subtracting is coming along well…too well. We can’t get anything over on him anymore. He’s even learned his French numbers up to twenty…and thanks to the botany exchange students working on the farm, he’s learned Japanese numbers also.
Well, I’m off to do something about my tongue. It feels like its bleeding. I really should get a new addiction. Yikes!
Pumpkin Waffle Recipe Is Available
- By Tracy Ames
- Published August 25, 2010
Hello All,
I had a request for pumpkin waffles with vanilla bean butter. You'll find our favorite on the "Foodies" page. I've made a couple of tweaks which I've mentioned. I'll also post the butter recipe later tonight after I've remade it.
Ok, I don't write these things down--I wing it. :)
Chat later!
"Reveal" A Poem By Christopher Reilley Is Now Available
- By Tracy Ames
- Published August 23, 2010
Good evening folks,
Christopher has posted another poem for your viewing pleasure entitled "Reveal". Next to "Roses of Blue", this is my favorite. He is an amazing scribbler and I hope you enjoy his work as much as I do.
Cheers!