The Issue of Ménage à Trois
- By Tracy Ames
- Published June 27, 2010
Tracy Ames
Mrs. Ames is an international bestselling author of interracial erotic fiction and a former columnist for several newsletters and magazines.
A native of the San Francisco Bay Area, Tracy currently split time between CT & New York City with her husband, children and a host of pets.
*NEWER* Leather & Lace Tumblr(NSFW)
*NEW* RR&R Tumblr (Safe)
Youtube
Facebook
Myspace
I have a few questions for you guys:
Do you enjoy reading ménage à trois based stories?
What draws you to them?
What turns you off?
Would you rather read FFM or MFM? If so, why?
Would it turn you on more if one of the characters were bi-sexual? If so, why?
We're tossing around some ideas and I'd love to hear from you readers. You can answer anonymously if you’d like. Thanks!
Do you enjoy reading ménage à trois based stories?
What draws you to them?
What turns you off?
Would you rather read FFM or MFM? If so, why?
Would it turn you on more if one of the characters were bi-sexual? If so, why?
We're tossing around some ideas and I'd love to hear from you readers. You can answer anonymously if you’d like. Thanks!
Spread The Word
27 Responses to "The Issue of Ménage à Trois" 
|
said this on 27 Jun 2010 12:52:17 AM CDT
Last year, I discovered that I do enjoy menage a trois stories. The first menage a trois story I read involved a MFM relationship. Once I discovered I enjoyed the stories, my reading preference for menage a trois stories became a MFM coupling. I like the concept of a woman getting all her sexual needs met by two men at the same time. Furthermore, I don't have a problem with bisexuality being a part of the storyline.
|
Author/Admin)|
said this on 27 Jun 2010 1:55:58 AM CDT
I found that I like many of the stories based on menage a trois but I often wonder, "how can they share"? "Isn't someone going to be jealous at some point and topple the relationship down?" So, I decided that it takes some very STRONG, confident and secure people to keep such a relationship flourishing and special and lasting. I find I prefer MFM and everyone to be heterosexual. I guess I would rather both guys want the girl and want to satisfy her by either taking turns or going at it together with her rather than at any point focus on each other.
|
|
said this on 27 Jun 2010 9:01:30 AM CDT
That's my thing with menage based stories too Debbie, "how can they share"? In most of the ones I've read I see the author giving one of the men more intimacy with the female lead than the other and that irks me. If it is a menage then they both shoud have equal time with the female. I don't have a problem with anyone of them being bi-sexual.
|
|
said this on 27 Jun 2010 11:21:41 AM CDT
I love menage based stories. I think the draw for me is the whole idea of two sexy men coming together and catering to all of the females sexual desires at the same time. As i'm sure you guessed I prefer MFM couplings. I wouldn't say it's a turn off but more of an observation. The menage books I have read to me haven't really dealt with the reality of a menage based realationship would probally encounter. It like three characters don't experince any issues or backlash from their freinds , familiy or society. Also like Debbie B. touched on there's never seems to be and issues of jeaslousy where one person for whatever reason feels left out or is threatened by the conection they feel the other two charcters might share. These would be real issues the people who choose that type if realtionship would have to face. I have read a few stories where the two male characters were bi- sexual. I actually thought it was kind of hot. I didn't have any issues with it.
|
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 10:38:43 AM CDT
I prefer the MFM couplings. I actually discovered this 2 years ago while reading a paranormal romance. I do however get turned off if there is no proper storyline. It also doesn't bother me if the two male characters are bi-sexual it just makes the story more interesting
|
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 1:05:29 PM CDT
Although I can consume group sex pornos, preferrably mfm, I'm no fan of reading it. Have read a couple, by some really good I/R erotica authors, but they left me cold. I think they didn't capture my imagination and convince me to the point that these characters could be in love. What I've noticed though with myself, is that if the author could sell it to me, like with porn, no romantic feelings involved, just plain getting off each other, then it would be more appealing, but too many try to sell this romantic ideal, that I can't fathom, as it boggles my mind that 3 (or more) people could share each other like that in a romantic way. Lustful, oh yeah.
|
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 8:10:38 PM CDT
I like to read erotic romance stories with ménage à trios. I read only mfm. The problem with ménage a trios stories is that they live strictly in there fantasy world, it’s like the setting of the book doesn’t leave the bedroom. As Crystal mentioned I would like to know what happens when reality kicks in, i.e. the opinion of friends, family, etc… Also I would like to read about more in-depth characters. What are their reasons for wanting a ménage à trios relationship? Is it security, to have a sense of belonging or is it strictly about sex? What happens when they discuss the future and/or children?
I don’t know if my response is pertaining to a possible book or short story. If it’s for a book then it would be nice to have details, details, details. Character details, relationship details and of course sexual details. If it’s for a short story then I can settle for just great sex scenes ;0) |
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 8:40:59 PM CDT
Oh and a major turn off for me when I read ménage a trios has to do with bad sexual sequences. This is not in just ménage a trios stories, but I’ve noticed it in at least two so far. Maybe it’s the future doctor in me I don’t know, but what I do know is that I don’t want to read about a man performing anal sex and then going straight into vaginal or oral sex without properly cleaning himself. That’s just a trip to the gynecologist, gastroenterologist and every other kind of specialist you can think of waiting to happen. I know this is a weird analogy but it always makes me think of when I was a kid being potty trained and my mom would say “wipe from front to back, not back to front”. Lol. The writer might not have noticed because he/she was caught up in the sex, but for some reason it makes it hard for me to finish reading the scene.
|
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 9:02:54 PM CDT
Did some one say ménage? Hell yeah! I'm in! Oh wait, you said do I like to read them. My bad, Tracy! Of course I love to read them.
Of course I seem to be out of the norm because I like m/m/f over m/f/m but I enjoy...errr read both. Bring it on Tracy! Olga, you have already brought it and keep it coming! Woo! |
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 9:08:22 PM CDT
Hot Damn! Stephanie is awake! When are we going to get a ménage from you?
Olga will be coming out with one fairly soon. I have a small one in the works. ;-) |
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 9:16:34 PM CDT
LOL! I am always awake Tracy. Sometimes a little too much for most ;-)
I can definitely try to squeeze in a ménage. I already have 2 others stories in the works for the site. Might as well add one more... |
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 9:19:49 PM CDT
Woman, don't over do it. Jeez, don't make Greg bench you as well. He letting me have a little freedom...when he reads this thread you'll be benched!
|
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 10:21:58 PM CDT
No, when Greg reads this thread you will be benched. LOL! I'll be allowed to carry on as I always do...
|
|
said this on 30 Jun 2010 1:24:59 AM CDT
Stephanie,
Do you mean you prefer f/f/m? because m/m/f and m/f/m what's the difference? |
|
said this on 28 Jun 2010 9:12:50 PM CDT
Thanks everyone for your input. Believe it or not, a few authors are reading this thread for your advice, LOL! So bring it on....
Trust me, we're noting everything you're saying. |
|
said this on 02 Jul 2010 9:02:37 AM CDT
Well, I it is pretty clear that I am not bothered by a menage story. I can tell that writing one is a B#&^@! Giving everyone equal time in the story, let alone during the sex scenes is just ridiculous. I haven't even delved in the the gynecological issues that Calvetta mentioned, but now I am on guard about that. Oh no! My brain hurts...
|
|
said this on 02 Jul 2010 3:06:47 PM CDT
My mentor gave me a piece of advice that I've tried to write by: Characters should change every third line.
She gave me some very good examples of well written menages and you know what....bang on...they changed every third line! They followed the same formula all of the way through the story. Tricky writers!! |
|
said this on 04 Jul 2010 9:35:48 PM CDT
For me it is M/F/M but at times I like a good M/M/F. Especially when both men are bi and it's interracial. Hey I am in romance heaven. Two good looking men from different ethnicity want you(BW). You can not get no better than that. Some M/M/F stories start off with both men been gay it doesn't really work unless there is reason why a woman was not in beginning of the relationship I can't picture it both men are gay and one day they want a woman. I can't wrap my mind around that, I just don't see it. As long author explain why she was not there okay I can get it. What I don't get and I have at least one story of M/M/M or F/F/F, I don't get it and I did not like it. What was the purpose...really...WHY?
|
|
said this on 25 Jul 2010 5:25:38 AM CDT
I stumbled across this blog and wasn't going to write anything (I have this horrible disposition of lurking) but it really surprises me how many people can enjoy a m/f/m. I am female and having all my needs catered to by two men sounds divine, but what about the men? Yes, there is still the woman, but how can you be in a relationship with a sort of convoluted one sided connection? I prefer m/m/f simply because the relationship is developed from all sides. M/f/m's tend to be all about the woman and for sex that's fine but in a relationship that'll ultimately lead to jealousy.
|
|
said this on 25 Jul 2010 6:38:51 AM CDT
Thanks for coming out of the shadows, Kiana. I love hearing from new readers.
I think the reason women lean towards M/F/M relationship is as you stated: It's all about their needs being met. Having never been in a poly relationship, I'd imagine it would working only if there was a solid foundation (friendship/love) in place before anything began. I'm just spit-balling. :) |
|
said this on 14 Aug 2010 10:58:13 PM CDT
In no particular order. OK, *maybe* the order is from less romantic to more romantic.
I said this once already, but I find ALL of the anal trends in porn to be more than a bit of a horror show. Doesn't matter what sort of anal play you might want to try or are already indulging, almost every time I see anal in porn, even without the dreaded (blechh) ATM scenes I want to shout you're doing it wrong. Even a show like CALIFORNICATION took care last seasons to explain (with humor) everything that can go wrong when some very basic hygiene issues are ignored. Which is not to say anal can't be great. As one friend once told me (I have no idea if this is true, "6 degrees warmer and about about 12 more muscles used!" Truly, your mileage may vary - but there ARE very real health guidelines. I'm yammering on about this because with porn driving trends I worry about a generation of kids having health problems I didn't even learn about from books until I was in my late twenties. ********************* ********* Menage stories are easier if you're just doing sexual one-offs (or "three-offs") but as a sustained relationship with three sexually active partners in an exclusive relationship where each person loves the other I find that harder to swallow. Oh my. ANYways... As for the physics... well, it's all good until you get to "crossed swords" and ball slapping "issues." So, are you going to describe that? If your target audience is women it probably doesn't matter. If it's guys, well, I can imagine losing at least half of them on that one. But that's just a guess. On the other hand, IF you make that an "issue" you could probably do some light comedy about three people negotiating that very tricky flesh-in-flesh-on-flesh percussive territory. As for FFM, well that sounds lovely but I hope the women are bi or that guy is going to need to be some sort of multi-tasking master juggler. If memory serves. |
|
said this on 15 Aug 2010 7:19:51 PM CDT
Hmmm. Didn't mean to kill that one in it's tracks.
|
|
said this on 15 Aug 2010 7:26:34 PM CDT
Barney you didn't kill anything. I haven't had the time to address your response yet. I will...I promise. :)
|
|
said this on 15 Aug 2010 9:07:42 PM CDT
NO rush and NO worries. I just stress after the fact because I keep using essentially x-rated/non erotica imagery in what is meant to be an erotica forum. Losing the forest for the cunny or, what have you.
|
|
said this on 17 Aug 2010 11:13:13 AM CDT
Umm... Tracy? [looks down, stares at shoes, shuffles] umm...
ménage à "trois" |
|
said this on 17 Aug 2010 11:58:01 AM CDT
Alright, I can’t even address the anal talk. *shivers* Handling the cross swords bit is what some authors have an issue with. Some go the Bi-male route while others (such as myself) would avoid mentioning the balls altogether.
Balls aren’t exactly hot. Yes, men need them however most women don’t want to read about them—it’s not a turn on. Menage stories are more difficult when there are actual feelings there. So yes, the one-offs are easier to pen. There has to be a strong male figure if the relationship is FFM. A weak male character would destroy the story in a heartbeat. There also has to be a more dominate female…not saying that one has to be a push over. What I’m saying is that there has to be a balance of power. If the formula is mucked around with too much or goes undeveloped, then the readers will trash. |
|
said this on 06 May 2012 8:18:19 PM CDT
Ok. I love both; m/m/f or m/f/m. Ib would not enjoy a story where it was f/m/f. If I'm being honest it would seem that its all about the male aspect. Since I'm purchasing the book for my own romantic fantasies, I. Want it to be all about the female. However, I do not mind if the males interact with each other. It does not have to be because they are bisexual but, more out of an expression of love that they have for each other as well as the female in the group. Is that not what romance novels are about...love. so, why not have an expression of that love between everyone involved instead of putting labels on them.
|