Momma Ames and I were having one of our WASP DNA chats. These chat normally consist of me asking far too many questions about the traditions and WASPs bloodlines. Our latest was no different.

Coming from a patriarchal driven family, I understand the desire for male heirs, however, the WASPs have taken this concept to a whole new (or rather, old) level. They must have male heirs from a male line of the family. They eat it, sleep it, and breathe it! They’d hump it if it had genitals.




As discussed in earlier post. I initially believed this obsession with males was monetary based…ie ensuring the family’s loot remained in the family. But I was wrong. Yes, while keeping their money within the family is very important it’s not the sole or most important piece of the puzzle.

It’s the Y chromosome: the chromosome responsible for maleness. The Y chromosome can only be past from father to son…example: Granddad—Dad—Greg. As long as this chain goes unbroken the family’s blood/history is easily traceable right down to ancient encampments—it’s how we track populations through time…their blood is literally frozen in time.





Only when the female (or lower branch) of the family take up the duty of carrying the family’s name do things become murky. The links are now broken. This is why it’s customary amongst WASP to choose one son (oldest or not) to carry their name…ie the key folder…ie Granddad…ie Dad….ie Greg.

No male heirs from Greg means the line transfers to his younger brother Howard. Not so fast! Greg and Howard don’t get along. So Greg skips Howard in favor of Howard’s oldest son and his namesake, Greg.

Okay now that everyone is up to speed, let’s move on….

Momma Ames and I start flipping through the family albums…yes, albums…these people are vain!!!! They break out a camera for any and every reason imaginable….“Wait, Eva’s opening an envelope!” CLICK!






Sorry, I got sidetracked…

As we’re flipping, something wondrous happens: I feel a sense of pride. I’ve never met or heard of most of these Scandinavian looking folks but there’s a sense of family pride I only get when looking at my own family. I begin to see things through the Ames’ eyes. No, they’re not proud of how they made their loot but made it they did…and it’s each successive generation’s inherent responsible to better, protect, and continue the family.

In this way, I see the invisible ties Greg has to his family. You won’t see him kicking back at a country club anytime soon but you will see his name on the roll. And you won’t see him at the family’s horse stables but you will see him at the family’s fundraiser dancing with his Great Aunt (seriously, those two are inseparable!).

Objectively speaking, WASPs aren’t any different from the rest of us. Who am I kidding?! Yes they are! They’re big old blood hogging, picture taking, snobs!

I love my family!!




Just so you know, Rick Rescorla IS NOT a WASP!!


The Other Shizz
To everyone who made recipe request, they're coming. I tested a few over the holiday.

End of Shizz...